Emotional clearing

Sadness does not want to be healed. It wants to be held.

Jeff Foster

Every time you are triggered it is an unfinished emotional process offering itself for clearing. It is our willingness to metabolise uncomfortable emotions that builds our resilience and ability to move to where we want to be in life.

When overwhelming events happen to us, and around us, as children, they often get left unacknowledged and unresolved. The fight/flight mechanism does not get turned off. Parts of us get emotionally frozen in time and split off. Parts of us stay on red alert and prone freeze when we are challenged. This tension will keep getting activated until it is acknowledged and released.

By revisiting the source events of triggering situations, in a safe space of acceptance, we gain insight into why we react to certain situations the way we do. We get to finish the emotional movement that has been trapped in the body for years.

Emotions are our inner guidance system.
Feelings tell us where we’re at with the world around us.
Our gut feeling is usually correct.

As children we learn which emotions feel good and which don’t. Emotions like fear, anger and sadness were overwhelming when we were small. We avoid them and lock them down rather than feel and express them. In this avoidance we also push away gut feelings. If we learn to ignore our gut feelings, we eventually learn to not trust ourselves.

Locking down feelings serves us in many ways when we are little; keeping us nice for our parents, masking vulnerability, keeping us ‘good’. But if we are carrying these habits into adulthood, we build up a reservoir of unreleased emotional tension. The resistance to feel and express causes inner conflict.

Among many symptoms, suppressed emotional energy can lead to depression, addictive compulsions, persistent agitation and nervousness, sleeplessness, relationship issues, sexual dysfunction and chronic health issues.

When we release what we have been holding on to for years, we often find that we unlock parts of ourselves that were locked down with the pain.

Creativity and relationality flow better. We feel more at ease and able to be comfortable in the world. We get better at regulating our own nervous system and the body enjoys greater homeostatic balance.

Talking therapies are of immense value. However, we are only dealing with a fraction of the healing process if the emotions are not metabolised through the body. It is by feeling the emotions we’d rather avoid that we most effectively process our stuff.

In practice, emotional clearing beautifully complements compassionate inquiry and systemic constellations.

It is a gentle process. Locating the emotions on the body and giving them the attention and space they need to move through.
It is a slowing down and breathing into the physical sensations that arise as we explore your story.

Is it safe?

We take it slow. We are walking nervous systems and sometimes they get a bit frazzled. We take the space to get used to being in the body. We explore sensation and emotion at a pace that is manageable and soothing.

People I work with sometimes express a concern that by feeling their anger and rage it might be like releasing a champagne cork that won’t go back in the bottle. They fear that the rage will be too much and that they will end up destroying everything and everyone around them. Or, similarly, to experience sadness could result in a slide into depression.

It doesn’t work like that.

When difficult emotions are felt, it can feel a little intense for a short time and then there’s a great feeling of relief and openness.
We hold that space together and make sure it feels safe for your younger part to experience.

As adults we are better equipped to embrace the sensations that we found overwhelming as children. The part of us that steps up to do the work does so safe in the knowledge that we are going to be fine.



121 sessions

My 121 work is a blend of Compassionate Inquiry, systemic coaching, constellations and emotional clearing.

Compassionate Inquiry

Gabor Maté has been hugely influential in bringing to light the connection between childhood trauma, chronic health issues and addiction.

Systemic constellations and coaching

Astonishing possibilities come to bloom when people gather in the name of love.


A 30-minute ‘are we a good fit’ session is free.

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How can I help?

I offer a free 30-minute chat to see if we’re a good fit. Enter your information below and I will get in touch to arrange the call.


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